Thursday 31 May 2012

When the apocalypse comes, beep me!

It would be easy for you to assume I must be a fan of horror films. I'm not. They scare the absolute bejeezus out of me. My brain doesn't seem to accept the logic that they're not real and there's nothing to fear. Instead, it leaps straight to "holy crap, this could really happen, what the hell am I going to do?, I'd better keep all the lights in the house on as a warning to any vampires/demons/evil spirits/mass-murderers etc to keep away".

Zombies are pretty much at the top of my "things that scare me" list. I think it's because they're so single-minded. You can't negotiate with them or appeal to their better nature. If they get you, that's it, game over.

And lets face it, it's not going to be a quick death. They'll rip lumps of flesh from your body using their dull, unsharpened teeth and you'll feel every single bite until you die from shock or blood loss.

It's not like it even ends there. You'll then have the joy of reanimating and trying to eat your family and anyone else that crosses your path.

Overall, it's not an experience that'll ever be going on my bucket list.

So how did I get here? to a point where the reason behind my desire to get fit is to avoid becoming zombie fodder? to a point where I'm having regular zombie apocalypse survival discussions on twitter?

It started when I found out the computer game "Resident Evil" was being adapted into a film. I'd never played the game myself, or had any desire to, but I was really excited about the film, as I'm a huge fan of Milla Jovovich who had been cast in the lead role of "Alice". I even ventured to the cinema on my own to watch it!

Although the films in the Resident Evil series tell the story about how the zombie apocalypse begins and what happens afterwards, they're all about the action rather than the deep thinking so I never thought any more about the subject until I came across what, in my opinion, is one of the best tv programmes to have been made in recent years; The Walking Dead. 

Focusing on the relationships, conflicts, and dilemmas faced by a small group of survivors of the zombie apocalypse, The Walking Dead is very much a programme that asks how you keep your humanity in inhuman times and it makes you question what you would do under the same circumstances.

I'm not the only one that started thinking about how I'd survive in the event of a major catastrophe; the Centers for Disease Control and Preventions also got into the act with their zombie preparedness campaign. It may have been tongue in cheek but it definately helped them to connect with a new audience and as their director, Dr Ali Khan, notes "If you are generally well equipped to deal with a zombie apocalypse, you will be prepared for a hurricane, pandemic, earthquake, or terrorist attack". Good to know.

So like many, my fascination with the zombie apocalypse isn't to do with the zombies themselves, or driven by any desire to scare myself, it's about how I'd survive if society and life as we knew it collapsed. Will I be able to keep myself alive? What will I be prepared to do to achieve that? How much of my humanity will remain intact? What am I willing to sacrifice? 

Am I ready? I've made a start but I've a lot more to do, including a beginner's Archery course in the Autumn. Because no zombie apocalypse would be complete without a woman with a crossbow.

If it's good enough for Buffy, it's good enough for me!

How prepared are you? I'd love for you to share your thoughts with me.


Unknown said...

Hmm... Probably not at all. At the moment I have to focus on being fit enough to run after my duck crazed dog across half of Hampshire when he gets a nose for the chase. Can't think about zombies yet

Unknown said...

Well the fitness bit is very slow really - but we have bows (longbows not cross bows) and I'm a pretty good aim so thats not too bad. But the fitness definitely needs more effort still!

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