After completing my 12 days of Buffy challenge on Monday, I treated myself to a day off from my blog yesterday and...I felt lost! This really surprised me, as it's not like I don't have anything else to do each day. There's the boys to keep clean, fed, watered and entertained; the house to keep tidy; the dog to walk; and Christmas to prepare for.

Here are some of the highlights of a normal day in my house:

• Drag myself out of bed in the morning after the joy of the baby waking up 2 hourly throughout the night
• Try and fail to have a hot cup of tea
• Get all the basic jobs done (clean the kitchen, hoover, at least 1 load of laundry)
• Deal with the many and varied requests from the toddler and baby
• Breathe a sigh of relief when the toddler has his lunchtime nap and if I've got the timing right, take the baby to bed at the same time so we can both have some more sleep
• Berate myself for failing to devise some innovative and educational way of entertaining the boys/for not taking them out (thus also leading to me berating myself for not walking the dog)/for being quite comatose due to a distinct lack of sleep
• Deal with the inevitable pre-bedtime "excitement"
• Collapse in a stupor in front of the tv once the boys are in bed. Well, I say in bed but the baby's not at that stage yet so my evening's are still spent with one child attached to me
• Try to remind myself that as long as the boys are fed, watered, clean and happy I've done a good job and it's unreasonable to expect myself to be some kind of all-singing all-dancing amazing collectors edition of a mum, especially when the baby's so little
• Get up and do it all again the next day, and the next...
 

Without the focus that the challenge gave me, I achieved nothing but the very, and I mean very, bare minimum yesterday *whispers* and today.

Now whilst there are most definitely times when days like that are needed for our own mental and physical wellbeing, yesterday wasn't one of them. Instead, I was left feeling that my lack of focus prevented me from achieving my normal 'what I'm doing is good enough' mantra and this is most definitely bad.

It seems if I have a "just for myself" goal in a day then I also achieve more in the other areas of my life. This then makes me feel good; in control; capable and successful. In short, I don't feel like a bad mother.

So, I need to get my sense of direction back and what better way to do that than to list here all the blogging things that I need to do now my 12 days of Buffy challenge has finished. Here's my to-do list:

1. Write a guest post for the lovely Cat at Yellow Days
2. Join in with the new I Spy photo meme; that's started over at Mum Of One
3. Accept my Leibster award from Bluebirdsunshine and More Than A Mum
4. Write an "all I want for Christmas" post courtesy of the tag I received from Dorky Mum
5. Get involved in the grooving mums challenge set by Kate On Thin Ice
6. Write an "I'm a celebrity, get me out of here" post courtesy of the tag I received from Mummy Mishaps
7. Rewrite the "about me" section of my blog
8. Link my 12 days of Buffy posts to my 12 days of Buffy blog page

I'm going to get started tomorrow so if you catch me dawdling on twitter, give me a prod and send me on my way!

Have you ever felt invisible? What would you do if you were invisible for a day, or longer?

In episode 11 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, we discover that Marcie Ross, ignored and treated as though she doesn't exist at school, has actually become invisible. Rather than solving her problems, the continued loneliness and isolation has driven her insane and she plans to horrifically disfigure the most popular girl at school, Cordelia, to make her understand what it's like to be an outcast.

What's interesting about this episode is you start out sympathising with Marcie but by the end, you've seen an unexpected depth and intelligence in Cordelia. She may be the queen bee but hers is still a lonely throne:

Cordelia: Hey! You think I'm never lonely because I'm so cute and popular? I can be surrounded by people and be completely alone. It's not like any of them really know me. I don't even know if they like me half the time. People just want to be in a popular zone. Sometimes when I talk, everyone's so busy agreeing with me, they don't hear a word I say.

Out of all the episodes I've watched so far, this one best sums up the feelings that led to me starting this blog. Having 2 babies in 2.5 years has been incredibly rewarding but lets face it, it's also been, and still is, extremely exhausting. My life has undergone this huge transformation and even though I knew this would happen, it's still hard to come to terms with.

There's the 'little' things like the physical changes to my body, the postnatel hair loss, the ridiculously dry skin, the fact I haven't worn heels since 2008 and struggle to walk in them now, my limited wardrobe, the lack of inexpensive clothing that's suitable for breastfeeding, not being able to find time to drink a hot cup of tea or to indulge myself in other ways (like a long, luxurious bubble bath).

Then there's the bigger things like the sleep deprivation, loss of privacy, feeling like my body is no longer my own, having no time to pursue my own interests, having no energy to take care of myself and did I mention the lack of sleep?

I think what I'm trying to say is that I find having children all-consuming. I am so busy being a mum that I have no time to be me. I have become invisible to myself.

Feeling that I've lost my identity as a woman is what led me to start blogging and in turn, to set myself the 12 days of Buffy challenge. And let me tell you, it HAS been a challenge! I am shocked at how difficult it has been to find the opportunity to watch one episode of Buffy, in peace, and to cross one thing off my to-do list each day. Then there's writing my daily update, which easily takes me a couple of hours because I'm completely out of practice when it comes to writing and words aren't yet coming easily to me.

I am glad I started this process though. I feel better about myself; I have something to talk about other than my boys and it's good to spend some time doing something that's purely for me each day. Husband says I've been sparkling since starting the challenge and I think that's probably the perfect adjective for how I feel. It certainly encourages me to keep going and gives me faith that I too can be a hell of a woman.

I put my to-do list to one side today and instead concentrated on catching up on some sleep. The baby and I spent a couple of extra hours in bed this morning while husband and toddler entertained each other, and we both felt a lot more well rested for it.

Please keep your fingers crossed for the minimum of night feeds tonight. I'm not naieve enough to think sleeping through is anywhere near being on the cards yet!

Now, before I go and scuttle off to bed, please go and support the rest of #teambuffy: Nyssapod, Chapters of Claire, Made by Tamsin and Margot and Barbara. All of these ladies are working on their own variation of the 12 days of Buffy challenge and I would really appreciate it if you'd give them a boost and tell them they're doing a great job.

See you tomorrow for the grand finale x

You'll have to forgive me. I'm incredibly tired. I had a hideous night with the baby and today wasn't much better. I'm sat here now thinking I should try harder to turn this into a post you'll want to continue reading but in all honesty, I want to collapse in bed and cry.

The nightmares encountered in episode 10 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer were of a different flavour to mine and unsurprisingly, didn't involve babies. Lucky them. I'd happily be a circus vampire with bad hair and wearing only my underwear if I could at least sleep!

On the plus side, I emptied the huge cardboard box full of books that has been sat in our conservatory since we moved in 3 years ago. It's freed up a lot of space (and exposed a LOT of dog hairs!) and without wanting to sound too new age, there's a better 'flow' through that part of the house. Like there's more room in which to breathe.

Now, before I finally give in and crawl into bed, please go and support the rest of #teambuffy: Nyssapod, Chapters of Claire, Made by Tamsin and Margot and Barbara.

Also, if you want to jump into the 2 remaining days of this challenge, you can. You don't have to be a fan of Buffy - you just have to have a desire to get rid of some of those jobs you've been putting off for a while.

See you tomozzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz......*snort*.......zzzzzzzzzzzzz

There's something incredibly creepy about a ventriloquist's dummy. For me, it's the eyes. They're so big and static and simultaneously lacking in life whilst having too much life. 'Tis a freaky combination.

Fortunately, the twist in the 9th episode of season 1 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer is that Sid the dummy isn't a demonic denizen of hell. He is in fact a demon-hunter cursed into dummy-form. Phew! Now they only have to deal with the demon-possessed magician that's decided to harvest Giles' brain.

Now I know I should be writing about something that this episode has inspired in me but you'll have to forgive me because I'm a bit distracted.

Remember me mentioning about a month ago that husband had hurt his back? Well, he went to the Chiropractor's today because it wasn't completely better and it turns out he had 3 slipped discs which needed a good manipulation. He's not allowed to bend or lift or basically do anything that might exacerbate it for a week minimum and he's got to go back in a month so they can work on it a bit more.

I feel really sorry for him because since last April, he's worked really hard to lose weight and improve his fitness levels. He's lost over 7.5 stone and his stamina and endurance is the best it's ever been. He's also looking forwards to the GP not being able to dismiss any ailments he may have as being down  to his weight. He's very passionate about martial arts and will really miss being involved with his muay thai class albeit temporarily. He'll also miss being able to scoop up the toddler for big cuddles when he gets in from work.

I know that by comparison to what some others have to deal with, this is small potatoes but it just seems so bloody unfair that after all his hard weight loss work, he's managed to do this to his back now rather than when he was overweight (a more common cause of slipped discs). Typical!

Today, I've decluttered and cleaned the bedroom, which leaves me with the following to do:

 

• Put locks on all the "un-safe" drawers/cupboards
• Sort out the big box of books that's been sat in the conservatory for the last 3 years
• Tidy and organise my craft table so if I wanted to, I could actually use it
• Put locks on the bedside drawers
• Make the boys some fleece trousers
• Do some batch cooking
• Finish the Christmas shopping

Husband and I have also devised a plan of attack for the spare bedroom but this particular job is on hold until his back's sorted.

Visit the rest of #teamBuffy:
To find out Nyssapod's thoughts on "the puppet show", listen to her audioboo or visit her written blog minibreakmummy.

 

After that, head on over to Chapters of Claire and read Claire's days 6 and 7 post.

 

Next, go and visit Made by Tamsin and check out her soap house.

Finally, pop over to Margot and Barbara to read about the first stage of Liz's Operation : Bedroom Sanctuary. 

 

All of these ladies have either made a commitment to clear their to-do lists or to write a daily blog post so thoroughly deserve our support.

Join In!

 

As I've been saying every day so far, there's still time for you to join #teambuffy and jump into the 3 remaining days of this challenge (oh my god! three quarters of the way through!). You don't have to be a fan of Buffy - you just have to have a desire to get rid of some of those jobs you've been putting off for a while.

See you tomorrow x

Just a quick post tonight because the baby is ridiculously overtired and screaming very loudly in my ear!

What I should be writing about is how "I robot...you, Jane" reminds us that we never really know who we might be talking to over the internet. In this case, it turns out "Malcolm", the 18 year old boy that Willow has fallen for after several lengthy online conversations, is actually Moloch the Corruptor; a demon that had been imprisoned in a book but was inadvertently released into cyberspace when the book contents were scanned onto the computer.

At the very least I should be talking about how modern technology like computers, CCTV and mobile phones has changed our day to day lives.

Instead, what I'm going to say is...LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT COMPUTER!!!!! It's a beast!

It's weird to think computers and mobile phones haven't always been sleek and light and slimline. Once upon a time, technology had lots of wires and aerials! How things have changed huh?!

Anyone remember when mobile phones were like this?

Or what about when computers were like this?

Imagine trying to blog with that little beauty on your lap instead of your handy laptop or trusty smartphone?!



Today, I finished filing 3 years' worth of paperwork. Of all the tasks I've done so far, this was by far the most soul destroying and I'm so relieved it's out of the way. Husband and I have agreed we need to take some time out each month to sort and tidy away all the post we receive, rather than letting it all accumulate in a box. We'll see!

 

Husband has the day off work tomorrow so I'm planning on delegating some of the to-do list to him. Fingers crossed we'll clear a big chunk of the list and I'll have an extra positive challenge update for you tomorrow.

 

Visit the rest of #teamBuffy?

To find out Nyssapod's thoughts on "I, robot...you, Jane", head on over to minibreakmummy and from there you can access her daily audiboos. Please also show her some support for her own to-do list that she's started to tackle.

 

After that, head on over to Chapters of Claire and read Claire's days 6 and 7 post. If you can, leave her a comment to boost her spirits a little and to let her know it doesn't matter if she's a little behind, life likes to throw these curveballs at us and it's okay to catch up when she can.

 

Next, go and visit Made by Tamsin and check out her rock buns. No that's not a euphemism!

Finally, if you haven't had chance to yet, pop over to Margot and Barbara to read how Liz is feeling inspired to tidy and sort her house, starting with her bedroom.

 

Join In!

As I've been saying every day so far, there's still time for you to join #teambuffy and jump into the 4 remaining days of this challenge (oh my god! two thirds of the way through!). You don't have to be a fan of Buffy - you just have to have a desire to get rid of some of those jobs you've been putting off for a while.

 

See you tomorrow x

I have a great deal of affection for episode six of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "The Pack". Indeed it's one of my favourites and I'd been looking forward to watching it since beginning this challenge. Let me tell you why.

I'm sure we can all recall "that group" at school. You know the one I mean. The group that thought they were so cool and took great pleasure in picking on those that were different/shy/socially awkward.

Well this episode takes the issue of classroom bullying and pack behaviour and then ups the stakes by not only literalising the subject with the pack being possessed by hyena spirits but by making Xander one of those that is possessed.

Yes, there is comedy in this episode mainly driven by the fact Xander's new behaviours are attributed to his being a hormonal (read sex obsessed) 16 year old boy. But there's also more sinister moments: when the pack eats the school mascot (Herbert the pig), when Xander tries to rape Buffy and when the rest of the pack eats the Principal (RIP Principal Flutie).

This combination of humour and drama is something that Buffy the Vampire Slayer always did very well and I think it's part of the reason why the whole programme resonated with me so much. If it had been more one than the other, I don't think the issues that it dealt with would have seemed quite as real. After all, life is never 100% comedy or drama.

But let me be honest. That's not the real reason why I love this episode. No. It's actually because I have a crush on possessed Xander and I don't think I've ever admitted that "out loud" before.

The hyena spirit initially imbues Xander with self-confidence; he walks taller, he makes strong eye contact, he seems more mysterious and that animal attraction is definitely there. Nicholas Brendon does a terrific job, in my opinion, of showing us the changes in Xander in quite a subtle way; enough that we recognise he's different but we can't quite put our fingers on why.

I'm sure I can't be the only person out there who finds themself responding to Xander in quite a lustful way can I? You'll be glad to hear the attraction wears off as the hyena spirit takes over and he becomes a small animal eating degenerate. I do have standards you know!

This has got me thinking, is there anyone out there that you wouldn't normally be attracted to but for some reason you can't quite fathom (or maybe you can), you find yourself salivating at the very thought of them? I'd love to hear your stories so please leave a comment and/or a link to a post you may have done on the subject so I can be nosey and visit!

Today, I've completed 1/2 of my Christmas shopping, which I'm really pleased about. I've listed everything else I need to buy but I couldn't 100% finish the shopping today, as I've got to upload lots of photos so I can have some photobooks of the kids made up and quite simply, I ran out of time. Never mind though, the fact I had a good go at tackling something on my to-do list makes today a success to me.

This is what's left for me to do:

• File away all the paperwork
• Put locks on all the "un-safe" drawers/cupboards
• Sort out the big box of books that's been sat in the conservatory for the last 3 years
• Tidy and organise my craft table so if I wanted to, I could actually use it
• Declutter the bedroom
• Put locks on the bedside drawers
• Make the boys some fleece trousers
• Do some batch cooking
• Finish the Christmas shopping

And the biggest one of all:

• Declutter and clean the spare bedroom before decorating it ready for the toddler to move into after his Boxing day birthday. The baby will then move into the nursery

Visit the rest of #teamBuffy?

To find out Nyssapod's thoughts on "the pack", head on over to minibreakmummy. She's also started to tackle her own to-do list and you can read all about it here.

Don't forget to visit Chapters of Claire to find out how Claire's getting on with her to-do list.

And after that, go and visit Made by Tamsin and support her in her endeavour to publish a post every day of the advent calendar.

Join In!

Finally, and as I've been saying every day so far, there's still time for you to join #teambuffy and jump into the 6 remaining days of this challenge. You don't have to be a fan of Buffy - you just have to have a desire to get rid of some of those jobs you've been putting off for a while. If I can do it so can you!

See you tomorrow x



After yesterday's disappointment and the resultant big knock to my confidence, I woke up today determined to be kinder to myself, write yesterday off as a blip and not to be too quick to concede defeat.

For a change, I tackled my to-do list first and I managed to change the whole look of our dining room table from this:

To this:

I've also banned everyone in the house from putting anything on it EVER AGAIN!

I waited until the evening to settle down to watch episode 5 "never kill a boy on the first date" of Buffy's first season. Husband was out at muay thai, toddler was up in bed attempting to sleep (his monologue down the baby monitor was quite entertaining) and baby was latched on snoozing. All of which equalled peace at last for me!

Now this episode never springs to mind whenever I think about the opening season of Buffy even though it does serve to further the story arc about the Master's fiendish plans to escape his supernatural prison and cause chaos, yadda, yadda, yadda. Because of this, I was looking forward to watching it with fresh eyes and being able to astound you all with my amazing insights.

What actually happened was less than a 1/4 of the way into the episode, I spied Buffy wearing the most fabulous animal print hooded jacket and I then spent the next 2 hours trawling around the net desperately trying to find an image of it to show you. And not just any image, but one that will do its quirky cosy snugness true justice.

Unfortunately, this was the best I could do:



I cannot tell you how much I love this jacket. If I was a jacket, I would be this one without a doubt in my mind.

In the past, I had a tradition that I would get a new coat on my birthday. Well, it's been a few years since I've done this. In fact, the last time must've been in 2007, as I started on the pregnancy rollercoaster in 2008, and I suspect it was the whole baby bump/lack of funds combo that caused the tradition to stop.

I'm not great at shopping for clothes but I love shopping for a coat. I always know when I've found the right one because I can feel it speaking to me. Choosing a coat has always been one of the ways in which I've expressed my personality and I can't believe I'd forgotten that!

As from today, the yearly coat buying tradition is reinstated!

Yay, I just found a piece of me and it's all down to Buffy the Vampire Slayer!

This is what's left on my to-do list:

• File away all the paperwork
• Put locks on all the "un-safe" drawers/cupboards
• Sort out the big box of books that's been sat in the conservatory for the last 3 years
• Tidy and organise my craft table so if I wanted to, I could actually use it
• Declutter the bedroom
• Put locks on the bedside drawers
• Make the boys some fleece trousers
• Do some batch cooking
• Do the Christmas shopping

And the biggest one of all:

• Declutter and clean the spare bedroom before decorating it ready for the toddler to move into after his Boxing day birthday. The baby will then move into the nursery

Visit the rest of #teamBuffy?

To find out Nyssapod's thoughts on "never  kill a boy on the first date", head on over to Audioboo. You can also follow Nyssapod's progress at minibreakmummy. Starting from tomorrow, you'll also be able to follow Nyssapod via her written blog as she tackles her own to-do list. Keep showing her lots of support.

Don't forget to visit Chapters of Claire to find out how Claire's getting on with her to-do list.

 

And after that, go and visit Made by Tamsin who, inspired by this 12 days of Buffy challenge, has challenged herself to publish a post every day of the advent calendar.

Join In!

 

Finally, and as I've been saying every day so far, there's still time for you to join #teambuffy and jump into the 7 remaining days of this challenge. You don't have to be a fan of Buffy - you just have to have a desire to get rid of some of those jobs you've been putting off for a while. If I can do it so can you!

 

See you tomorrow x

Ah, 16 year old boys and the things they'd have you believe about their sexual exploits.

Fortunately, and unlike in episode 4 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, their tall tales rarely lead to them being drugged by their substitute teacher who then bites off their head as she mates with them.

Did I mention the teacher's actually a preying mantis? A REALLY big one!

Okay, so I was hoping to write an amusing post about teenagers but I'll be honest, I feel really low tonight and I'm not completely sure how this happened.

One of the factors contributing to my mood is that I failed to cross a task off my to-do list. I spent all morning thinking I had all afternoon to do it. Then we went out and I thought, never mind, I'll get something done while husband's sorting bathtime. This would've been fine except when it came down to it, I realised that the stretch of time while they're all in the bath isn't long enough to get all my 'normal' pre-bedtime jobs done AND something extra.

I tried to say to myself, it's alright, just get the Christmas shopping done - that's on the list - and at least you can sit at the laptop to do it. But I knew it wasn't going to happen. I find the whole bloody shopping thing SO stressful; the trying to figure out what to get everyone to the trying to source it at the best price so it sits within our tight budget. Garg! My blood is bubbling and my head throbbing just thinking about it!

So that's it then. Challenge failed. Game over. Except my brain didn't stop there. Oh no. It helpfully decided that I must therefore be failing at everything else in my life.

Surely it shouldn't be this hard to get things done each day? I'm 34 so shouldn't I be more than capable of managing my time by now? Is it just me? Am I the only one that finds it hard - sometimes impossible - to keep on top of things now I have 2 children? I honestly feel like it is. Worse yet, I feel like people are waiting for me to fail. That they'd be happy if I couldn't cope because they never thought I'd be able to in the first place.

Does it get better/easier? Please tell me it does and that when the kids are a bit older and I'm getting a bit more sleep, I'll be able to merrily juggle, well everything, while patting my head and rubbing my stomach.

On the plus side, the #teambuffy girls have been on hand with soothing words and a reminder that sometimes life gets in the way and it's important not to put too much pressure on yourself. It helps me feel less like a failure and more like someone that needs to pick herself up, dust herself off and start again tomorrow. And I will. I'm not going to give up now.

For a more upbeat 12 days of Buffy challenge update, head on over to Audioboo to hear from Nyssapod. You can also follow her progress at minibreakmummy.

When you've done that, pop on over to Chapters of Claire where you'll find Claire's challenge updates.

And after that, go and visit Made by Tamsin who, inspired by this 12 days of Buffy challenge, has challenged herself to publish a post every day of the advent calendar.

Finally, and as I've been saying every day so far, there's still time for you to join #teambuffy and jump into the 8 remaining days of this challenge. You don't have to be a fan of Buffy - you just have to have a desire to get rid of some of those jobs you've been putting off for a while. And as this post has shown, sometimes you don't even have to do that!

See you tomorrow x

I thought, with today being Saturday, it'd be a doddle to complete day 3 of my 12 days of Buffy challenge. How wrong was I?!

The combination of a disrupted night's sleep, a nap-resisting toddler and baby, a spontaneous visit to see the in-laws, a juddering Buffy DVD and screaming sleep deprived children resulted in the bare minimum of me-time and only a very small window of time in which to try and complete one of the tasks on my to-do list.

As the baby is still awake and I'm yet to have my tea and some quality time with the husband, I'm going to make this post brief. I feel guilty about that but I need to make the most of my evening, rather than my on-line life, before the all-consuming, sheer relentlessness of 2 young, awake children resumes at what I hope will not be some unearthly hour of the morning.

So, in a nutshell, what was episode 3 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer about?

This is Amy:

This is Amy's mum:



Lets face it, with a mum like that, the episode was never going to go well.

That's right people, we're dealing with pushy mothers. And not just any pushy mother. She's a pushy mother who practices withcraft.

In her day, Catherine Madison was a successful cheerleader and she's desperate for her daughter Amy to follow in her footsteps. Frustrated that Amy doesn't manage to earn a place on the cheerleading squad, she casts a spell to switch bodies with her daughter and then picks off several of the cheerleaders so that there's a gap on the squad for her to fill. Fortunately, Buffy saves the day and Catherine's soul ends up trapped within the very cheerleading trophy that she won during her glory days on the squad.

Now you know the plot, own up! Are you a pushy mother? Do/did you have a pushy mother? Are you trying to squash your pushy traits? or are you embracing them?

Husband always jokes that in the future, toddler will be one of "those" that auditions for X-factor with complete conviction that they will get through and who seems to have absolutely no realisation at all that the sound coming from their mouth in no way resembles singing. Then when the judges ask him "who told you you could sing?" he'll say "my mum". And there I'll be in the background, fuming at the injustice of them not being able to see the talent that is clearly before their eyes!

Now I happen to think toddler has a lovely singing voice, along with many other fine attributes, and do I want him to reach his full potential? yes. Do I want him to believe he can do anything he sets his mind to? yes. Will I support and encourage him along the way? absolutely. This then begs the question, what does it take for someone to cross the line between encouragement and pushiness?

I imagine it would be easy to become obsessive about your child's successes and failures if you don't have your own interests and identity. Surely if you only focus your energies on your children, it would be all too easy to slip into micro-managing them and pushing them harder than you otherwise would?

Of course I can only speculate, as I have no real experience....yet! If you have a pushy mother story, I'd love to hear it. Please feel free to share the details in the comments box below and if you have a blog post on the subject, include a link so I can be nosey and visit!

I managed to cross another task off my to-do list today, although I confess I opted for the easiest (take down the halloween gel stickers on the interior window) just so I could make sure I passed the challenge.

 

This is what's left on my list:

 

• Clear the dining room table
• File away all the paperwork
• Put locks on all the "un-safe" drawers/cupboards
• Sort out the big box of books that's been sat in the conservatory for the last 3 years
• Tidy and organise my craft table so if I wanted to, I could actually use it
• Declutter the bedroom
• Put locks on the bedside drawers
• Make the boys some fleece trousers
• Do some batch cooking
• Do the Christmas shopping

And the biggest one of all:

• Declutter and clean the spare bedroom before decorating it ready for the toddler to move into after his Boxing day birthday. The baby will then move into the nursery *sob*

What next?

To find out Nyssapod's thoughts on "Witch", head on over to Audioboo. You can also follow Nyssapod's progress at minibreakmummy.

When you've done that, pop on over to Chapters of Claire where you'll find Claire's challenge updates.

 

We all really appreciate your support. Thank you.

 

Join in!

If you want to join in the 12 days of Buffy challenge then details of how to do this can be found on my previous posts here, here and here. You don't have to be a fan of Buffy - you just have to have a desire to get rid of some of those jobs you've been putting off for a while. It's about clearing the decks and paving the way for your own fresh start.

See you tomorrow x

After yesterday's success, I was so keen to jump back into the Buffyverse that I practically sprinted upstairs to put the toddler to bed as soon as he started to look tired!

Today's episode was "The Harvest" in which Buffy's secret is revealed to Willow and Xander, the scooby gang (as they call themselves) is formed and an apocalypse averted. All in a day's work right?!

I found myself noticing how different everyone looked in season 1 by comparison to the seventh season finale. There is a real feeling of youth and vitality that abounds throughout this and the previous episode. This feeling, along with the humour, camaraderie and more importantly, the truthfulness of the writing, is what allows me to ignore the slow and clunky fight sequences, the odd piece of dodgy dialogue and the sparse but weirdly tinkly background music. I'm glad because if I hadn't been able to see past these flaws, I cannot for one minute believe I'd be the same person today as I am now.

Obviously part of the significance of this episode is that Buffy's secret is revealed and although the last thing she wants is to put anyone else's life in danger, the revelation ultimately benefits her, as she gains 2 close friends and therefore moves one step closer to the normality she craves.

This got me thinking about secrets. Do you have one? Would you ever consider sharing it? Are you happy to keep secrets from those who are closest to you? If not, how do you deal with the guilt? Has your secret had a positive/negative impact on your life?

I do have a secret. No, I won't share it here. Suffice to say I was placed in a very awkward situation by an individual and I then had to decide whether to say anything to a relative of that individual or not. It was a horrible position to be in made worse by the fact, for me, it felt like a no-win situation.

I won't keep a secret from my husband and luckily I've never been asked to! The only exception is if it's "insignificant" secrets about things like his birthday or Christmas presents.

What about you? I'd love to hear your thoughts about secrets. Please feel free to share them in the comments box below and if you have a blog post on the subject, include a link so I can be nosey and visit!

I'm really pleased that I managed to cross another 3 tasks off my to-do list today. I cleaned the living room blinds, decluttered the living room and dusted and tidied the mantlepiece. What surprised me was that when I got started, it didn't take me very long at all and the dulcet tone of the hoover even sent the baby to sleep! An unexpected bonus.

This is what's left on my list:

• Take down the hallowe'en gel stickers on the interior window
• Clear the dining room table
• File away all the paperwork
• Put locks on all the "un-safe" drawers/cupboards
• Sort out the big box of books that's been sat in the conservatory for the last 3 years
• Tidy and organise my craft table so if I wanted to, I could actually use it
• Declutter the bedroom
• Put locks on the bedside drawers
• Make the boys some fleece trousers
• Do some batch cooking
• Do the Christmas shopping

And the biggest one of all:

• Declutter and clean the spare bedroom before decorating it ready for the toddler to move into after his Boxing day birthday. The baby will then move into the nursery *sob*

What next?

To find out Nyssapod's thoughts on "The Havest", head on over to Audioboo. You can also follow Nyssapod's progress at minibreakmummy.com.

 

When you've done that, pop on over to Chapters of Claire where you'll find Claire's progress updates as soon as she's had chance to write them up and publish them to her blog.

 

Join in!

If you want to join in the 12 days of Buffy challenge then details of how to do this can be found on my previous posts here and here. You don't have to be a fan of Buffy - you just have to have a desire to get rid of some of those jobs you've been putting off for a while. It's about clearing the decks and paving the way for your own fresh start.

See you tomorrow x

I took advantage of the toddler's lunchtime nap today by lovingly opening my Buffy the Vampire Slayer collector's edition boxset and settling down to watch the opening episode of season 1 : "welcome to the hellmouth".

As soon as the theme tune started, I had goosebumps and tears immediately welled up in my eyes. No other programme has ever had such an effect on me and I was glad to watch it in private, as I confess I feel very possessive over the whole series.

For those who have never watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer, 16 year old Buffy Summers and her mum have moved to Sunnydale from Los Angeles after Buffy was kicked out of school for setting fire to the gym (to destroy a vampire infestation). It's supposed to be a fresh start for both of them and Buffy is looking forwards to putting her secret life as a vampire slayer behind her for good.

Unfortunately, Sunnydale has other plans for Buffy and rather than being able to become a normal girl with normal worries, she quickly finds that turning a blind eye isn't possible; the responsibility she feels for keeping others safe outweighs her own wants.

What this episode has got me thinking about is "fitting in". I'm sure most, if not all of us, have been through a stage in our lives when we tried to fit in with others, with varying degrees of success. Most likely this stage took place at school.

I was 16 when I became aware that within the school hierarchy, I was classed as a geek. I had a close circle of friends and to them I was cool, but as far as the popular crowd were concerned, I didn't wear the right clothes, go to the right places, drink, smoke or have a boyfriend.

Of course one of the benefits of being 34 is that I can look back now and laugh! Why did we all think of them as the popular crowd? who decided what the right clothes and hang out places were? why were you expected to drink and smoke if you wanted to be part of the cool clique? and what does "popular" really mean?

In reality they were just a bunch of girls with over-inflated egos and bad attitudes. They were happy to whisper horrible things behind mine and my friends' backs and I can see now they weren't better, or any more special, than me or anyone else in school.

At the time though, I couldn't see all of that. I felt my life would in some way be improved if I was part of the popular crowd. I can recall making several attempts to enter their group but I was only ever allowed along the peripheray and as a result I spent several weeks in a kind of limbo situation - not part of my usual friendship group and not part of the new group. That sense of loneliness was not fun.

Fortunately, I came to my senses pretty quickly and since then, I've never tried to change myself to fit in with others.

I am not perfect. I have some less than desirable qualities and I'm not entirely confident about my physical appearance BUT you know what, I have some bloody good qualities and on a good day, I look in the mirror and think yeah, I AM fit! 

You are who you are and being true to yourself is one of the greatest lessons I believe we can all learn and then impart to our children.

I ticked 2 tasks off my to do list today. I posted some letters that had been sat at the bottom of my bag for a while and I replied to an email/facebook message about Christmas from my sister. The good news is that this means the most time-sensitive tasks are done and dusted. The bad news is the rest of my to-do list will not be quite as quick to deal with. This is what's left:

• Clean the living room blinds
• Declutter the living room
• Dust and tidy the mantlepiece
• Take down the hallowe'en gel stickers on the interior window
• Clear the dining room table
• File away all the paperwork
• Put locks on all the "un-safe" drawers/cupboards
• Sort out the big box of books that's been sat in the conservatory for the last 3 years
• Tidy and organise my craft table so if I wanted to, I could actually use it
• Declutter the bedroom
• Put locks on the bedside drawers
• Make the boys some fleece trousers
• Do some batch cooking
• Do the Christmas shopping

And the biggest one of all:

• Declutter and clean the spare bedroom before decorating it ready for the toddler to move into after his Boxing day birthday. The baby will then move into the nursery *sob*

By the way, my to-do list doesn't include any of the day-to-day tasks that I normally do!

Anyway, now you've finished reading my ramblings, head on over here to hear how "welcome to the hellmouth" has got nyssapod thinking. Nyssapod is also known as @minibreakmummy on twitter and her written blog is here.

When you've done that, pop on over to Chapters of Claire and congratulate her on sorting out Nathaniel's keepsake box and making a start on Amelia's keepsake box.

Join in!

If you want to join in the 12 days of Buffy challenge then details of how to do this can be found on my previous post Becoming : Part 2. You don't have to be a fan of Buffy - you just have to have a desire to get rid of some of those jobs you've been putting off for a while. It's about clearing the decks and paving the way for your own fresh start.

See you tomorrow x